Love beyond Valentine’s Day

We’re taught to chase love like it’s something to be earned through achievements, relationships, and the approval of others. We chat to Art Historian and Curator, Carrie Scott, who explores what it really means to own your worth, to invest in yourself without guilt, and to celebrate love beyond Valentine’s Day. 

From the way women have reclaimed their image in Art to the way a simple piece of jewellery can become a personal talisman, this is a love letter to the longest relationship you’ll ever have—the one with yourself.

In a world that often equates love with external validation, how do you cultivate a love that comes from within?

Love that lasts—that truly sustains us—has to come from within. It’s about turning the gaze inward, becoming both subject and artist of your own self-worth. Art offers a lesson here: a masterpiece isn’t validated by how many people see it, but by the depth of its creation. Likewise, self-love grows through rituals, boundaries, and radical self-acceptance. And a ton of forgiveness. We don’t need to be perfect. 

How has your relationship with yourself changed over the years, and what advice would you give to your younger self about self-love?

My younger self sought affirmation externally—through achievements, relationships, and the opinions of others. But self-love isn’t a reward; it’s a practice. I’d tell her to be as kind to herself as she is to others, to protect her joy with the same energy she defends her work, and to recognize that she is already enough. And also that we all need to mother ourselves – even if our mothers are still alive. 

As an art historian, you’ve studied different artistic movements—how do you think the concept of self-love, particularly for women, has been depicted in art through the ages?

Art history is full of contradictions when it comes to self-love. Women have often been muses, objects of admiration rather than agents of their own image. But there are exceptions—Frida Kahlo painting her pain and power in self-portraits, Suzanne Valadon reclaiming the female nude, or Mickalene Thomas reimagining Black female identity in her dazzling compositions. (Go see Thomas’ show that’s just opened at the Hayward). These works remind me that self-love isn’t passive; it’s an act of reclamation.

We often celebrate love for others on Valentine’s Day, but how can we reclaim it as a day of self-love?

By flipping the script. Instead of waiting for someone else to mark the day, we can make it about deep, intentional care for ourselves. Whether that’s buying yourself the bouquet you love, setting aside time to be alone with your thoughts, or simply refusing to apologize for taking up space—self-love deserves a grand gesture too.

Many women struggle with the idea of treating themselves—often prioritizing others first. What would you say to someone who finds it hard to invest in themselves?

Consider this: if you were an artwork, you wouldn’t let dust collect on the frame or allow others to decide where you belong. Investing in yourself—whether through time, experiences, or even beautiful objects—isn’t selfish. It’s maintenance. It’s preservation. It’s saying, “I am worthy of care, compassion and love.”

What does it mean to truly own your self-worth, and how can material objects like jewellery serve as reminders of that?

Self-worth is knowing you are valuable without condition—without needing permission, applause, or approval. Jewellery, like art, carries symbolism. A ring you buy for yourself, a necklace that represents a moment of growth—these objects become talismans, reminders of your own power. They aren’t about status; they’re about story. When I bought my first Manpriya piece it was most definitely that for me. A token of my own appreciation of the growth and work I’d put it. And when I wear it, I’m reminded of how proud I am of the shift I put in. 

If self-love had a visual representation—an artwork, a symbol, or even a piece of jewellery—what would it look like to you?

A hand-mirror, slightly worn but still reflecting light – just like the piece I bought from you. A Louise Bourgeois Maman spider—strong, protective, resilient, graceful. Or a simple gold band, inscribed with something only you know —because the longest, most important relationship you’ll ever have is with yourself.

Carrie shares her favourite picks from MANPRIYA this Valentine’s Day.